STRESS- THERE'S AN APP FOR THAT!

So this morning I totally broke my resolution for the new year and used the phrase "sure as hell" when speaking to an insurance company rep.  When she reacted by saying she preferred that I not use profanity I asked to speak with a grown up.  Yeah - not much of a love ninja today.

After I concluded my business (I am thinking after 30 years with my insurance carrier that it may be time to make a switch.) I recalled reading about this on the Scientific American website:

An almond-shaped structure in the center of the brain called the amygdala is a hub for emotional responses. When it’s in high gear, feelings tend to rule the neural roost, blocking the ability to rationally consider the best course of action. Ideally, we would all pause long enough for rational thought to take over—say, after someone cuts us off on the road or criticizes our efforts at work or at home. Some educators believe that such a skill should be taught to everyone at a very young age.


A curriculum called MindUP conceived by actor Goldie Hawn includes an activity called the "amygdala shake-up" designed to help children understand the need for this sort of patience. For this activity, a teacher creates a crude model of the amygdala from a soda bottle filled with water, sand and glitter. Then, in front of the class (or a single student), she turns over the bottle and shakes up its contents to show what happens when a person gets stressed or upset. Once the glitter and sand are mixed, she rights the bottle and waits for the sand and glitter to settle, explaining that the wait represents the time it takes the amygdala to calm down enough so that a person can make a good choice.

What an excellent thing to teach kids!  I like the glitter image, too.  It reminds me of that idea of "seeing red."

I also read this great post by a teacher who teaches mindfulness in her classroom.  She writes about the connection between the amygdala and bullying.

 I need to remember to take that deep breath first, BEFORE I react…instead of after when I am trying to calm myself down.

RESOLUTION FAIL

Well, it is January 3rd and  I have already failed to keep my New Year's Resolution to be a "Love Ninja".

I thought it would be difficult to maintain my love while driving to and from work.  I had a comment from Smalltown Me that she has the same issue with tourists driving in her area.  I was thinking that I need to come up with a mantra to chant while driving to keep my mind otherwise engaged while navigating in and around the other human beings on the road (see?  I wanted to call them idiots but I didn't...)

But driving has been ok.  I tapped my horn at someone who didn't notice the light had changed and they actually waved a thanks.  I gave him a thumbs up.  Very loving.

USBank, on the other hand is neither giving or getting my love and while I was not bitchy to the person who (after going through 5 menus and then being transferred twice and being on hold then having to repeat strings of numbers and personal identification) told me the error message I received when I could not upload my bills from Quicken to the bank was not their issue.  Even though the error message was quite specific about the source of the problem.

When I informed him I was at work and not on the computer with Quicken he was quite snippy. He said I need to call again when I am home in order to fix it.  I wanted to tell him how unhappy I am with my banking experience this morning and in the past few months (I won't even go into the problems they created when they changed the Health Savings Accounts.)  I wanted to tell him that I spent 15 minutes at home trying to make the bills upload and then 12 minutes at work just waiting to talk to a human.  But I didn't.  I hung up on him.

I immediately felt shame for my behavior.  So while I have broken my resolution already, I know I can do better.  Love, forgiveness and kindness in the face of unhelpful, alleged customer service - om.