THE PRINCE OF OUR DREAMS

When I was a girl, the eligible prince was Prince Charles of England. Many girls I whiled away the hours thinking of ways to get to England and meet him and become a princess.

Eventually he married a beautiful, much younger woman and had a family. The first little prince seemed to be a wonderful match for my oldest child, but she had no interest in pursuing him.

Tonight at midnight millions of women, young and old will flock to the theaters to see the young man pictured here play the perfect man - a vampire named Edward. My younger daughter loves the books about this young man, but she remains faithful to:

Rupert Grint of Harry Potter fame. She whiles away the hours thinking of ways to get to England and meet him and become a movie star's wife.

PASSING GAS THROUGH THE YEARS

When Sex and the City went into syndication with all the juicy bits cut out, I wasn't so sure it would hold up - but I do enjoy coming across it at odd hours when I am looking for something to watch.

There was one episode where Carrie was with Mr. Big and she passed gas. She acted all humiliated and worried that their relationship would suffer because of this slip. That episode bothered me on many levels. First, I am the oldest of 5 kids. We shared one bathroom and came and went without a lot of concern for personal space and modesty. There was one thing that we all teased about and that was "who let one?" Even the parents got in on it.

It was light hearted and it didn't create any phobias about this very human occurrence. One memorable night, my mom jumped up from the couch, charged over to the sliding glass door, backed her fanny out the door and, by the look on her face, saved us all from certain unpleasantness.

So years later when a good friend turned lover told me, as part of his list of reasons we shouldn't see each other any more, that I was uptight and withholding. In what way? He said I never had gas when I was awake, just when I was asleep - so I must be holding it, therefore not being natural with him. I still think I may be the only woman in the world who was broken up with because I didn't fart enough.

I think of him with some frequency now that I am in menopause, because for some reason, menopause sets the gas production into high gear. Now that I am suitably gassy for him - should I give him a call?

HAPPY SHOPPING

On my way to and from work, I listen to K-FOG radio. I love the morning show people. They are funny and smart and kind. The lead DJ is Dave Morey. He is a gay man with a personality which frequently makes me want to be an attractive gay man so I could be his boyfriend. Sigh.

Anyway. They were interviewing someone this morning and doing their best to avoid talking about Christmas because "it isn't even Thanksgiving yet." I work in a business where we start talking about Christmas in July. Actually we call it "holidays" because we do not discriminate when it comes to celebrations which involve giving of gifts.

I do understand the rebellion against walking into Costco in August and seeing the gift wrapping, LED wreaths and electronic reindeer. It is disconcerting to think that people buy that stuff so early. Yet - would they haul it out and put it up if people didn't? I doubt it.

I have always attempted to get my shopping done early because I don't enjoy what happens to crowds of people when they are under stress. I would rather avoid the malls in December. So the early start is ok with me.

Happy Holidays!

8 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME

I am taking Dcup up on her tag offer on the 8 random facts about me meme because I am plumb out of inspiration today.

1. I have 5 red purses and 8 pairs of red shoes (including flip flops).

2. I get a pedicure every 6 weeks all year round.

3. Showers, never baths.

4. I can and do eat pickles, I cannot eat cucumbers.

5. I can't stand lasagna - especially the smell of it.

6. I iron most of my clothes.

7. I can perform simple toilet repairs.

8. There are at least 3 purchases I intend to return in the back of my car. A couple of them have been there for over a year.

I hereby pass the favor of a tag to anyone who is in need.

SUNDAY SUPPER

This recipe from the Top Chef website. It was done by Antonia on Season 4. I have not been able to find the veggie rice specified in the menu and have made it with the wild & brown rice. Also, I have forgotten to buy the cilantro, substituting 1 minced garlic clove. Sometimes I can't find the mache and make it with a whole package of arugula.

RICE SALAD WITH SKIRT STEAK

1 lb skirt steak

salt & pepper

olive oil

Uncle Ben's 90 second veggie rice (or wild rice w/herbs)

sliced cherry tomatoes

1/4 red onion sliced very thin

1/2 package mache

1/2 package baby arugula

Cilantro to taste

2 egg yolks

2 T rice wine vinegar

sugar

salt & pepper

Vinaigrette:

Blend cilantro, egg yolks, vinegar, salt, sugar to taste and drizzle of oil

Salad:

Mix greens, onion, tomatoes. Microwave rice and let it cool until warm.

Salt and pepper skirt steak, drizzle with olive oil. Grill to desired degree of doneness. (Usually about 3 minutes per side.)

Dress salad, add rice and sliced steak.

Really good leftovers for lunch...

PANTRY DINNERS ALL WEEK

I have been attempting to compete in the The Great Subsistence Experiment conceived of by Suburban Correspondent over at The More, The Messier. Her idea was to live off what is on hand for 2 weeks.




Now I admit, my participation is largely because I just didn't feel like going to the store last weekend and because I have been short on cash due to early holiday gift shopping. Also, the pantry and the freezer are very full, so there has to be enough to eat for at least a week of meals. And I'm curious about what is lurking in the back of the cabinet.

THIS IS WHAT I COOKED THIS WEEK:

Monday - Spaghetti and salad

Tuesday - Chicken with Stuffing and broccoli

Wednesday - Tortellini Soup with Spinach and bread

Thursday - Chicken Paprika with noodles and lima beans

Friday - Take out Greek food

Saturday - Turkey Burgers, oven fried zucchini

I plan to go on for a few more days, but went to the store for fruit, veggies, cream cheese, eggs and toilet paper. The pantry doesn't look much different, but the frig is bare and the freezer looks like it's time for a Costco trip.

AN ENCOURAGING WORD

I ran the Kaiser gauntlet today. We finally got to see a specialist about the stomach pain Ally has been experiencing for 2 years. We had to drive for over a hour to get there, then they sent us to the wrong building and floor. Fortunately the GI doc was great and helpful and I am hopeful.

Outside one of the elevators was a little poster with a full page of things to say to "Encourage Your Child". The quick glance I got included "Good job!' "Keep going." and other inane things that it is hard to believe have to be written down.

I have been noticing many parents who seem to be dragging their kids around, speaking to them in the gritted teeth kind of anger and berating them for walking a few feet away in the store. It makes me sad, but I also remember that I was tense with my kids so much of he time, too. When you are in the thick of it - it is hard to see how harmless so much of their behaviour is.

But to make a list of the most simple things? Like people don't already know how to praise or encourage their kids? Then I realized. I've never seen that flyer in the Kaiser where we live. It was posted in Oakland where a largely minority population lives. Their lives are probably a lot more stressful than mine ever was. And if they were raised in the same difficult environment, maybe kind words were few and far between and so those words of encouragement don't come so easily.

So Ally and I both had an enlightening visit to the doctor.

WHAT IS YOUR FANTASY?

It was a bit slow at work today. It is worrisome, because we are a business which relies on the revenue from the holiday season to help pull us through the slower months.

Today we had time to chat. I have been discussing my daughter's struggles to finalize her major and minor status in school and make decisions about her future career possibilities. So that lead to a discussion of DREAM JOB. Qualifications, references, skills and resources are all set - what would you do?

Co-worker A said she wants Judge Judy's job. She thinks being a judge would mean everyone listens to you and you can ask all the questions you want. Co-worker T said she would be a nature and travel photographer. She would live in a tropical place, but travel the world. She would return home from her travels to write and produce her photos. She wants to meet people and learn about different cultures and traditions. The owner of the company Kyle would do just what she's doing. she has always loved designing and running her own company.

I realize I would want to be a writer - a columnist with unlimited topics so I could travel and write about food and politics and family and whatever strikes my fancy. The thing I learned I loved in law school was research. I would love to follow my interest in something and then write about it - then follow another whim or fancy, learn and write about that.

I love hearing about people's fantasies. One time I was talking to my sister about a fantasy of mine to have a place of my own to go to. Like that song in My Fair Lady - a room somewhere with one enormous chair. She said she has that same fantasy, except her room is all white. We had a laugh that it sounded like her fantasy was to land in an asylum!

I MADE IT TO MENOPAUSE

My favorite blogger, Mrs. G mentioned in a recent post that her doc suggested she was embarking on the long hormonal jag journey called perimenopause. My fervent best wishes. As of this very month, I have graduated to full menopause. The end of the journey - or is it?

By some serendipitous quirk of the universe, I started having symptom at the same time my younger sister had breast cancer treatment which put her into early perimenopause. So we have had years of sisterly sharing.

Actually it has been amazing how in step we have been. We tended to very frequent, but short periods, rather than longer time between them, we had the same type of hot flashes, which varied over time from the all over flush of heat lasting 5 minutes to the quick flash heat lasting less than a minute but came one after another all day. she woke up during the night, I couldn't go to sleep'till the wee hours.

I didn't think I was having mood swings until my husband was setting up a new computer and logged my name as "Moody" with a little storm cloud icon. I tried to pay more attention after that, but when you are having PMS and periods twice a month, there is not much time for rational thought.

Last year I was in the waiting room at Kaiser and saw a magazine article called "Why Menopause Starts with Me". It was by the author of "The Female Brain", Dr. Louann Brizendine. I recognised myself immediately. I knew my interest in housekeeping and menu planning, cooking and, heaven help me, shopping had noticeably waned. She explained that my brain had shifted to a place where child rearing and all things domestic had diminished in importance. Just knowng that was a relief. I cut myself a break about those things, realizing that I hadn't become lazy, just interested in other things.

I must say that after 9 years of symptoms, realizing I had not had a period in a year was really nice. However, I am still having hot flashes. Everyday. Some nights. Is this one of those things they don't tell women? Like those details of childbirth and what it is like to share a bathroom with a man?

After all that my body has been through, all that my mind has had to cope with, you'd think reaching the end of the childbearing portion of my life would be rewarded with some sort of golden glow or gift certificate or something. I know! I'm going out to buy all new undies!

WHY BLOG?

When I was in high school I was a writer for the newspaper. I was also into the idea of being a writer. To that end, I loved to read quotations by famous authors and I even copied them down and pinned them to the bulletin boards I had artfully arranged to cover the hated wallpaper in my room. My interests ran from the Beatles to The Prophet. I had books of quotes about love that I poured over, trying to find out what love would be like if it ever came my way.

When it was time to go to college, I decided I should be a journalism major. I knew I didn't have enough of a creative spark to be a fiction writer, but I was good with facts and writing plainly. After I had devoted several years to my J degree (as we cool J people called it) I realized that I didn't really want to chase stories in some little town until I could chase stories in a larger town, until I could chase stories in a place I would really like to live. But by then, it was too late to change majors and I really didn't know what I would change to, anyway.

So right out of college I went into sales. Yuck. Then I went into restaurant management. Better, but long hours and not intellectually satisfying. Then I went for career counseling and found out I had a lot of interests. Duh. Since I didn't know what to do, I went to law school. I liked it for 2 years then it dawned on me that it required a certain amount of picky meanness that I couldn't summon up.

I finished it and found a job in the marketing department of a small company. My writing ability, my law background and my creative side all came into play. It was a really great fit. They even said I could come back part time after my twins were born. Then the company was sold. I had the babies and realized I didn't want to go to work, and we could afford for me to be home.

Why, oh, why I am writing about this? To try to figure out why I am blogging.

When I had to go out to find work after 12 years of being home with kids. No one knew what to do with me and I didn't know what I could do anymore. In the job I have, I have been able to rediscover the writer in me. First by answering e-mail. Later by writing articles for our site and others. Then we started blogging. I am a "ghost writer" in some of the work that I do, but other things are in my name - all in my "voice."

I know that I am not a superior writer - I have seen too many blogs that are wonderfully written to suffer that delusion. I just know that I want to write and I seem to think of things to write about. This forum of blogging makes it possible to do something beyond scribbling in journals. Maybe people other than my friends and family will find me and enjoy something I write - that will be cool.