SHOPPING JONES

I have had an obsession for shopping for the past month.  Seeing the trees turning and experiencing the cool mornings and evenings has pushed my somewhat excess shopping buttons. For the past 9 year I have worn the same 2 jackets in the cold months.  A reversible rain jacket and a really nice leather jacket.  The combination of warming hormonal changes and a rather limited life made it possible to attend most winter events comfortably.

Now I find myself coatless.  Even the impulse purchased red trench raincoat which I squeezed into once or twice is way too big now.  I have been shivering my way to work in the mornings and layering up when we go out in the evenings.

The threat of rain this week set me in motion.  I poured over the internet to see what to expect in the stores.  Seems that double breasted is very big - but not my favorite look.  The patch work mix of leather and wool is cool but maybe too trendy for someone who plans to wear the same coat for many years to come.  Stunned by the department store prices I was seeing and underwhelmed by the selection in the usual discount stores, I asked around at work and was told to go to Burlington Coat Factory which is just down the road. Somehow it had never occurred to me that a place named "Burlington Coat Factory" would actually have coats...

Happily they had great coats at fabulous prices.  After trying on about 20, I bought a rain coat and a dressier wool coat - both from Michael Kors.  I have already shortened the sleeve on the raincoat, but plan to take the wool coat to a seamstress to alter. I go both coats for well under $200.00 so I don't mind paying to have alterations.

My next shopping jones will be some warmer shoes.  My former work environments allowed me to wear more casual clothing and shoes plus had the advantage of being warmer than where I work now, especially because I am in and out of our warehouse.  I am thinking a cool oxford...

BODY, BODIES, BODS

It's one of those things women can't ever seem to get right.  Fashion dictates one thing, men desire another, surgery creates the unnatural. Medicine suggests we fit into the narrow lines of a chart, one look around the locker room tells us that isn't realistic.

This weekend I was sitting poolside with my sister and her daughter.  My sister is concerned that her daughter is too heavy.  Her daughter seems to be quite comfortable in her body.  My youngest daughter is heavier than I think she should be, too.  I struggle with talking to her about it.  What must it sound like to have an obese mom talk to you about your tummy?  I worry because I don't want her to go down my road, she worries because she is okay with how she looks - is that bad?

There are  girls trying to be super thin and also girls getting to be  fat.  The fat girls, because there are so many more of them than there were in the past, aren't getting quite as stigmatized.  They call themselves curvy which suggests they have chosen their look just as the skinny girls have.

This morning I heard about a study in the UK that 7 out of 8 women didn't feel attractive.  How sad is that?  I know that at my advance age and size I feel past being attractive, but I still have my days.  So when I think of all those young women out there not feeling pretty, it just makes me feel sad. 

There is something so wonderful about that feeling of being attractive - feeling young and alive that I still remember.  It gives a glow.  It is really about happiness.  If women are happy, it doesn't matter what their physical appearance is; how symmetrical their features, how big their bust or slim their hips. 

So that is the answer - not to take away our daughter's happiness with themselves.  Offer them the opportunities to make healthy choices and love them and nurture their happiness and beauty.

CRIMINAL OR SOCIAL?

A few weeks ago I became aware of Pinterest.  I know, a bit behind the curve, but I have made up for it by spending hours pouring over pictures and recipes and laughing out loud at some of the stuff posted there.

The concept of Social Bookmarking was new to me.  You see stuff on the web and instead of saving that page to your computer favorites to refer to later, you bookmark it to one of these sites.  In the case of Pinterest, you pin it to one of many boards you can make, each titled as you like. You can also see what others have pinned to their boards and like it, comment on it or repin it to your own boards.

Pinterest has a variety of interests represented, but there are also social bookmarking sites out there for men (http://manteresting.com/) where the images are not pinned, but nailed - so manly.  Sites also focus on fashion, design, gadgets and porn.  Why am I not surprised, and no, I didn't look at that one.

So, another fun, time sucking thing to do online.  Because you realize after a bit that you want to add your own actual stuff to the boards, not just look and repin.  Doing that, my mind starts working as I am looking around for images to add.  Is this okay, legally and all?  For my little blogs read by a mere handful of folks and not monetized, I tend not to worry about using images from the web even though I know that legally I should be purchasing or getting permission to use them. 

The reality is that there is limited legal use allowed of the images owned by someone else and Pinterest knows that. When you sign up, if you read the fine print, they put the legal risk on the pinners/board owners to have permission to use the images.  In reality, I am not certain why someone who has allowed their images to be put on the web would be angry that they are embraced and being used on a social bookmarking site, but there may be a situation where that  happens.

The best way around this issue to to not use these sites. 

The second best way is to give full credit to the owner and publisher of the images, linking directly to the original source so that others are able to go back to that source and purchase from or otherwise benefit that source. 

That is how I plan to proceed as I spend hour upon hour looking at sumptuous images of dream homes, travel destinations and garden projects, fashion I could never wear and recipes I might give a try.

WHY IS THIS STILL HAPPENING?

Apparently someone at JC Penny thought this was a "Fun Tee" for 7-16 year old girls!

They apparently got a lot of flak for it and  have removed it from their catalog. 

However this one is still there:

Do they not have women who work for Penny's?  Or men who have daughters?  Or someone who might, in 2011, for heaven's sake , see that this is a sexist and negative message to send?  Or is everyone out there in retail land out to make sure yet another generation of women grow up thinking their most important attribute is their looks and that intelligence and success is for men.

And all these tee shirts which have been pulled from the website?  Where do you suppose they are going to end up?  I suspect that they will be sold in a Third World Country where the women don't have anyone looking out for their best interests.

FALLING FOR FASHION

Went over to visit Schadenfruede Warehouse after noticing a number of  interesting comments she made on Derfwad Manor  (which really illustrates my need to make a resolution to wait until after I go to the gym to go online - it is now 11 a.m. and I put my gym clothes on at about 7:30...)

Anyhoo, Eunice over there posted this:

The question -  is this is fashion?  And, really, this is supposed to be cool?  My fashonista daughter might sleep in it, but wear it out?  I don't think so.  I went to the Target site and found the top and pants - they total up to $39.00.  Those boots don't appear to be sold at Target unless they are men's work boots. So it is, at least, an affordable "look."


Unlike this found in Teen Magazine:

This outfit runs about $4000.00, including the shoes, bag and $108.00 gloves!  I don't run with the crowd that can buy this back to school outfit.


I used to buy the fashion magazines and try to punch up my wardrobe with new things, so just for fun I  checked out what are meant to be the Fall trends - few of them will work for me.  The colors are mustard, rust and jade. The shapes include chunky sweaters with gauzy or long skirts and peplums on jackets.  The prints are camouflage, polka dots and big plaids.  Bright colored pants, choker necklaces and  "slit up to there" skirts for evening.  
 
Ally took my plaid scarf to college, but I do have a couple of polka dot blouses.  My body temperature never recovered from menopause - so no sweaters for me and my neck is too chubby for chokers.   Well, maybe the Spring fashion will be more my thing.

Following the trends?

THE BEAT GOES ON

When I was in the sixth grade I had pictures of Sonny & Cher cut out of the newspaper and taped to my desk lamp.  In particular I remember I had this one:

That was in the era of their hit son "Bang, Bang."  I don't recall seeing anyone else wearing those animal fur vests, although there were some variations of them with embroidery around during the sixties and seventies when everyone was wearing dress-up costumes from thrift stores and army surplus stores.  I could never manage to make that stuff look right on me.  In high school I rocked the  preppy look, though. 

I don't recall wearing bright yellow, but I did wear knee socks and flats with mini skits and ribbed turtlenecks and tees.  By college we were wearing maxi skirts, too.  I had a burgundy maxi-coat which cost most of my clothing allowance.

Anyway, I loved fashion,  I made lots of my own clothes so I could afford to follow the trends.  After I had kids and became an at home mom, I sort of fell out of being fashionable.  It is a cliche,  the "mom clothes."  At first you need things that you can wash and wear because of all the getting spit-up on.  You need to be able to move around easily, too.  So the leggings and big tops that were in style in the late 80's were perfect for a new mom.  From there it is a blur.  I tried to infuse fashion at times, but as age and weight added up, it got harder.

I still enjoy following fashion, but I don't like the extent it is now worshiped.  The heights to which fashion has been elevated is so far above what the average person can manage that it is more like fantasy.  I watch Project Runway and admire the talent, but don't understand the snobbish attitudes.  I watch the Rachel Zoe Project and it is so over the top I can't take it for anything but campy entertainment.  In case you don't know about Rachel Zoe, she is a "Stylist."  She helps movies stars  pick out their clothes and accessories for photo shoots, red carpet events and the like.  She is a tiny little super skinny woman who frequently wears fur vests.  I think she does it to make her look more substantial. 

Last I heard she was supposed to be selling them on one of the home shopping networks - so I guess I should not have been surprised when I saw that one of the Fall 2010 trends is...the fur vest.

So, the adage is that you can only wear the fashion the first time it comes around in your lifetime.  I never did wear the Sonny & Cher fur vest, or the hippy embroidered vest, and  I am not tempted to wear the 2010 version, either.  I hope my daughters won't be wearing it...and they should skip the knee socks, too.  Just in case they try to bring those back.  What were we thinking?

FRIDAY FAST ONES

1.) Went to get the canvas umbrella and lounge chair out of storage just in time to hear the news that it is going to rain AGAIN on Sunday. Geez. If I hear one word about drought this summer I am going to scream.

2.) On the other hand it smells like heaven in my backyard, the early blooming jasmine is going crazy and the lemon tree is blossoming. The wisteria has faded, but the later blooming star jasmine is getting ready to pop in a couple of weeks.

3.) We are signing our last lease on this house. I will really miss the little back yard. It is the perfect size and setting. However, I will not miss the trains going by day and night.

4. ) Tom and I need to get focused on where we are going to move next summer. We had always talked about the beach, but it is unrealistic at this time both for work and financial reasons. I have refused to move to a nearby town he likes (I don't see the charm.) So we need to start visiting other towns and find an area we both like. Personally, I like the town we live in now...the only thing missing is water. I miss living by water.

5.) My sister came over and I tried on clothes I have been amassing for our trip to Philadelphia. Some are new and some are old things I fit into again. She helped me decide on outfits and has ordered me to go to her house to get accessories. Apparently she has a lot of them and I (a) need them and (b) am woefully lacking.

6.) The 10 day forecast for Philadelphia features thurderstorms. In the 260 year history of the school the graduation ceremony has never had to be moved from the outdoor venue due to weather. Here's hoping this is NOT the history making year...

A FASHION GENE?

This photo took me hours to find - not too many photos of 1969 fashions out there! This is Maria Shriver!

Ally and I were hitting the sale at soon to be defunct Mervyns. She needed khakis for a drama thing, and since she swears she will never wear them again - I wanted to get them as on-sale as possible. She feels that she has a certain style reputation to uphold - skinny jeans work, khaki's don't.

I would react negatively to this concern for her daily look, except that I was similarly obsessed at her age. There were no skinny jeans for us, though, no pants at all for most of my high school years. We wore tights, pantyhose or, I can't believe I am saying this, knee socks with our short, short skirts and Mary Jane flats.

I read the fashion magazines and tried to add the little touches to make myself look with it, though my budget was pretty far out of it. I learned to sew and spent many hours at the fabric store and sewing machine to recreate the right look. I was lucky because I had straight, straight long hair. The one natural thing about me that fit in. The glasses and curvy figure were not in style, but the hair was perfection. It was Cher hair.

I realize that I am a bit indulgent of Ally's interest in her look because I know how much I would have enjoyed being able to have more fun clothes at her age. When she picked out zebra print shoes for the Homecoming Dance, I was so pround.